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Posts Tagged ‘Denial’

The Fifth and Sixth Stations: Persevering through Pain

Posted in Prayer, Reflections on Scripture, Way of the Cross, tagged , , , , , , , on March 10, 2023| Leave a Comment »

This post is a continuation of my Lenten reflections on the Scriptural Stations of the Cross. The station titles and scripture and verse citations, except where otherwise noted, are published on USCCB.org.

Photo by Francesco Alberti on Unsplash

Fifth Station: Jesus is Judged by Pilate

(Mark 15: 1-5, 15 [John 18:38 and Romans 8:31 — my insertions])

Jesus, as I read this passage, I imagine Pilate being focused on whether You seek power in the way that Pilate understands it. The power that Pilate is concerned about is a power that would come from an ambition to rule in Your place.

When You “You say so” to Pilate’s question about whether You are “the king of the Jews,” I imagine Pilate being reassured that You were no threat to his own power (Mark 15:2-3). He doesn’t see how You being “born . . . to testify to the truth” is a threat to his own power (John 18:38). He hasn’t been challenged by Your teachings as the Jewish authorities have. I imagine he hasn’t sought the true peace that comes from pursuing truth. He seeks only the appearance of peace that consists of making and keeping allies that suit different purposes at different times. This pseudo-peace concerns itself only with self-preservation. I imagine Pilate has this very limited perspective, and that’s why he reminds You of “how many things” the Sanhedrin accuse You of (Mark 15:4) I him.

But Jesus, You didn’t come to save yourself. You came to save creation. You are not concerned with others’ perception of you, except when that perception aligns with how God sees you. For You, the only approval that matters is approval given based on truth.

Jesus, help me to recognize the power of truth and to seek and find lasting peace that comes from its power. Help me to trust that You are embodied Truth and that because You are for me no one and nothing can be against me when I rest in You. Amen. (See Rom. 8:31)

Photo by Samuel Lopes on Unsplash

Sixth Station: Jesus is Scourged and Crowned with Thorns

(John 19: 1-3)

Jesus, open my mind and heart to the areas of my life in which I need to put up sturdier guardrails for myself. May I base my guardrails on the ones You have established for me — Your teachings and the Commandments by which you lived. Help me to remember that good can come from discipline, even though, when I first subject myself to it, it is uncomfortable. Sometimes, when I’m uncomfortable, I find strength not to flee from discomfort in remember that you endured not just discomfort but agonizing pain and that you gave the same Spirit to me that you possessed when you endured being scourged and crowned with thorns. The same Spirit that made you able to bear such pain and more enables me to face trials without being defeated in the long run — that is, if I trust in the Spirit and follow where it leads.

Holy Spirit, help me see the present moment clearly instead of letting regrets whip me. Show me how to use those regrets to make better choices.

Creator, Redeemer, and Sanctifier, help me not to make daydreams and entertainments into idols. Daydreams and entertainments are gifts of creativity. They can point me to You and to Your will for my life, but I need help to remember that pointing to You is not the same as being You. Help me to find rest and inspiration in creativity without being blinded or numbed by it. Help me to remember that You are the source of all creativity and beauty and to thank you for these gifts. Remind me that with You, I can embrace challenges and hardships. I can rest in daydreams and entertainments without hiding in them. I don’t have to use daydreams and entertainments to avoid hardships out of fear they are stronger than we are together. They are not stronger than we are together, and I can’t avoid hardships anyway. I can only delay facing them. Sometimes I can’t even delay facing them despite all the idols I try to put between me and them.

May I praise what You praise, and may my praise be sincere and thoughtful. Teach me to trust in the power that comes from You rather than in prestige and possessions. Amen.

The Bible. The New American Bible Revised Edition, Kindle edition, Fairbrother, 2011.

Confraternity of Christian Doctrine, Inc. “Sunday July, 2 2023: Readings at Mass.” The New American Bible, 2001. Universalis for Windows, Version 2.179, Universalis Publishing Ltd., 26 Feb. 2023, https://universalis.com/n-app-windows.htm

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The Third and Fourth Stations: Embracing Hard Truths

Posted in Prayer, Reflections on Scripture, Way of the Cross, Who Am I in God, Who is God, tagged , , , , on March 3, 2023| Leave a Comment »

This post is a continuation of my Lenten reflections on the Scriptural Stations of the Cross. The station titles and scripture and verse citations, except where otherwise noted, are published on USCCB.org.

Photo by Luis Villasmil on Unsplash —Photo taken in a Musem in Santiago de Chile

Third Station: Jesus is Condemned by the Sanhedrin

(Luke 22: 66-71)

This passage reminds me that the prospect of getting to know God is scary because this knowledge beckons me into a relationship with God, one that once I enter into it, changes my perspective and asks me to change how I live. It also asks me to ask questions, the answers of some of which, I won’t like because they invite me to further change, and change can be very uncomfortable. It involves laying down things I carry as security blankets, things I’m more comfortable trusting in than God, things that offer immediate and temporary comfort. Change may also require me to pick up what I don’t want to carry — things that are painful now and that will offer comfort only later.

Jesus, help me not only to hear but also to trust that I’m hearing Your voice. Help me to follow Your voice or to stay where You know I’m needed. Help me not to fear the changes that serving and surrendering to perfect love allow but instead to hope in their positive potential. Don’t let my fear get in the way of Your perfect love. I know that, in the end, nothing I do can weaken the power of that love. Nevertheless, I want to magnify its power rather than make it harder to see. I can be Your magnifying glass by first receiving Your Love, and the extent to which I do that is up to me. Jesus, help me to be open to it. Amen.

Fourth Station: Jesus is Denied by Peter

(Matthew 26: 69-75)

Photo by Saif71.com on Unsplash

It strikes me as I read this passage that while denying Jesus, Peter denies his own true identity and distances himself from a community that he needs and that needs him..

Jesus, when people ask me who You are in my life, and I deny how essential it is that You lived a human life and died a horrifically violent human death so that anyone who imitates Your human life can come to share in Divine life, I not only miss opportunities to participate in the sharing, I present myself as someone other than who I am. I lead a double life. I can’t be divided this way and live close to you or to other people because when I behave this way, I don’t let other people truly know me. I don’t let them know who I am in You. I can’t help build authentic community, community in which love and truth are inseparable from each other if I withhold my authentic self from others. However, not withholding this true self is always a struggle for me because rejection and embarrassment are always a possibility and a fear.

I’m employing the ” Litany of Trust” as armor to take into this struggle. I listened to it again this morning on the Hallow app. If you’re not able to access the audio through the previous link, here’s the text of “Litany of Trust.”

Thank you, Jesus for giving me examples of how to stand firm in who I am and for giving me an example, through Peter, of the consequences of losing sight of who I am, of doubting who I am, and of denying who I am in relation to You. Thank you for giving me an example, also through Peter, of the truth that my confusion, denials, and doubts don’t have to mean the end of my journey toward union with You. If I turn back to You when I realize I’ve turned away, I’m already moving toward you again. Thank you for forgiving me for denying you and my true self. Amen.

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